There was a thick set man with frog eyes
who was standing by the door
and a little bald man with wing nut ears
was waiting in the car
Well Robert Moore passed the frog eyed man
as he walked into the bar,
and Betty Coltrane she jumped under her table.
What's your pleasure? asked the barman
he had a face like boiled meat
There's a girl called Betty Coltrane
that I have come to see
But I ain't seen that girl 'round here
for more than a week
and Betty Coltrane she hid beneath the table.
Well, then in came a sailior with
mermaids tattooed on his arms,
Followed by the man with the wing nut ears
who was waitin' in the car
Well, Robert Moore sensed trouble,
he'd seen it comin' from afar
and Betty Coltrain she gasped beneath the table.
Well, the sailor said I'm looking for my wife,
they call her Betty Coltrain!
The frog eyed man said That can't be;
that's my wife's maiden name.
And the man with the wing nut ears said,
Hey, I married her back in Spain!
and Betty Coltrain crossed herself beneath the table.
Well, Robert Moore stepped up and said
That woman is my wife.
and he drew a silver pistol
and a wicked bowie knife;
And he shot the man with the wing nut ears
straight between the eyes
and Betty Coltrain, she moaned under the table.
The frog eyed man jumped at Robert Moore,
who stabbed him in the chest
and as Mister Frog eyes died he said
Betty, your the girl that I loved best!
The sailor pulled a razor,
Robert blasted it to bits
And Betty, I know you're under the table.
Well have no fear, said Robert Moore,
I do not want to hurt you!
Never a woman did'na love me
half as much as you.
You are the blessed' sun, girl
and you are the sacred moon.
and Betty shot his legs out from under the table!
Well, Robert Moore went down heavy
with a crash upon the floor
and over to his trashin' body
Betty Coltrain she did crawl.
She put the gun to the back of head
and pulled the trigger once more
and blew his brains out all over the table!
Well Betty stood up and shook her head
and waved the smoke away.
Said, I'm sorry Mr Barman
to leave your place this way.
As she emptied out their wallets she said,
I'll collect my severence pay.
and then she winked and threw a dollar on the table.
Australian musician and author Nick Cave was the lead singer of Aussie post-punk band The Birthday Party in the early 80s. They split in 1984 due to personal difficulties aggravated by drug and alcohol abuse, with Cave and multi-instrumentalist Mick Harvey teaming up to form Nick Cave & The Bad Seeds. Each of their albums have been hits with critics, but less successful with the public at large. Tender Prey (1988) and The Good Son (1990) were particularly praised, while Let Love In (1994) reached No.12 in the UK album charts. Murder Ballads (1996) got four places higher, and featured a duet with Kylie Minogue called "Where The Wild Roses Grow" that was a chart hit in several countries. The Boatman's Call (1997) was considered by many to be their best release yet. In 2004, Nick Cave & The Bad Seeds released their 13th studio album, the double-disc Abbatoir Blues/ The Lyre of Orpheus. Mojo Magazine (UK) and The Age (Australia) both named it their Album Of The Year, and other critics were enthusiastic too. Although the band haven't officially split up, Cave and three of the Bad Seeds have embarked on a side project called Grinderman.
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