Songtext Mental math Julien Baker

Mental math

Read it in a book once, don't remember where
If you're happy in a dream, it has to count for something
Cursing at the sun, you tell me not to swear
You ask if I get worse and I say, "Dammit, you can bet"

Hanging on a ledge outside of your house
Trying not to freak out, staring at the ground
Doing math in my head, how far is it down?
Not too good to beg for you to try to talk me down

You say you never had a good night's sleep
Any of the nights you spent with me
I ask if it'd be better when I leave
And then regret it
Maybe if I were a little patient
But I never learned the virtue in waiting
It's too late anyway to take it back

'Cause I have a lot to say
And never in the right way
And if I could just explain
Myself again

Oh, if I could fix you first
Tell me about what hurts
I'd try not to make it worse
Than it already has

'Cause I have a lot to say
And never in the right way
And if I could just explain
Myself again